Wednesday, August 11, 2010
I have had a lot of time to contemplate our adoption plans. I have had just about everyone think we are crazy. It is so hard to explain to people when you feel led to something. How do you put into words what God has put into your heart. How also do you not listen to that or turn your back on the path you feel you are supposed to be on. I am a very passionate and intense person. I also think as passionate and intense as I am< I am also very, very level headed. I try to think of every angle, mayby to much so. With adoption over the years I have done that. Sure we could have another biological baby, infact I think in the beginning my husband would have wanted that. Sure we could also forget about adoption and just keep going with our lives. The thing is though every time I do that, I feel God speaking to me and nudging me right back on the path. And if I believe so deeply in GOD than how can I ignore that. But to explain that to most people that are not in the adoption community is very very hard. Yes I can understand and respect where they come from, but this is our dream and our calling. We are all here to fullfill different purposes some of us just don't know them yet. Yes life is chaotic, money is hardly ever flowing, no there is not a right time always, but the truth is the time is NOW. These kids don't have the time. We could wait and there would always be something. I know adoption won't be easy, I know it will change the dynamics of all our lives but it really is the least we can do. God has sacrificed so much for all of us yet we constantly find reason to complain and feel that life just hasn't given us enough. We could take all this time and money and put it into something else, something big mayby a vacation, mayby something else but my heart is not there. It is with these children. It breaks every time I think of the love they don't have, they don't see. So therefore you see, I know what it is we have to do, what we must do. And I thank God that he has put this on my heart, that he has touched me with the compassion to do something to help these children. And if the least we can do is give them love and a family to call there own, than I will be happy with that.